Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Lessons of Loneliness Part Deux

Yesterday I talked about how, in this past year, I have become, inexplicably and unwantedly (Not sure that's a word, but it should be...) visited by the spectre of loneliness and its conjoined twin, fear. Since I wrote that article, an interesting thing has happened. Nefer, the ever clever escape artist, has been right at my side.  When I least expect it, he reaches out his paw and pats me on the cheek.  Just a little pat, no claws.  As if to say, "How can you be lonely when you have MEEEE????"  I have to admit that it makes me chuckle just a bit.  But it also makes me wonder just how sentient animals are.  Certainly they can be empathetic, as Nefer is proving.

On the other hand, Basti couldn't care less.  "Food?  You gonna give me wet food? Or do I have to keep searching in these darn bags for something yummy?"

 Havng said that, because I both try to learn lessons from the events of my life as well as be aware of the synchronicities, the little miracles, that happen, I want to share one more thing from the past 24 hours.

During the GSA (Great Sewage Adventure), I had to dismantle a bookcase that I thought contained mostly lives of the saints and books on writing. (I don't know about you, but I don't cull my bookshelves nearly often enough and so sometimes there are books lurking that I don't know I have.) The books were stacked on a sofa and I decided that perhaps I could use the sofa to actually sit on, so I began putting the books back on the shelves.

As I did, I found a slender, brown book that I remembered from my childhood.  I don't remember my mother reading it, but since the copyright is 1954, it had to be hers.  I sort of vaguely recalled reading parts of it when I was in my 20s and going through a rough patch, but I had forgotten about it.  Now here it was again--My Daily Bread by Anthony Paone, S.J. Apparently it has been in print all these years and I just happen to own a first edition. (Woo Hoo!)

My Daily Bread is a set of daily readings on various topics intended to inspire and guide one in listening to and following the words of the Christ. It's divided into several sections such as Conversion, After Conversion, Temptation and Bad Habits.  Each section consists of a meditation written in the first person as if Christ were speaking to you, a brief reflection and a prayer.

The ribbon bookmark was still in place, so I decided to open to that section and see what it had to say.  I was a little surprised, but not completely, to see that it was on fear, loneliness's conjoined twin. In part it read: (Many) do not think with their intelligence, but with their feelings...they are slaves of their fears...." The prayer of the day added, "Let me not offend you by a lack of confidence. I trust in you. I will do my best to remedy whatever difficulties arise, but whatever be the results of my efforts, I will accept them as your holy will."

Somehow the message from that little book from my past seems very appropriate advice for my future.


  1. Sherry1:44 PM

    God sends us little miracles when we need them. I'm glad you recognized this for what it was, a sign of his love. Love you!

  2. Sometimes we have to be looking for the love, don't we!


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