Saint Elizabeth Ann Seton and Financial Suffering

An excerpt from Facing Adversity with Grace about St. Elizabeth Ann Seton and financial struggles.

Because she is the first native-born American saint, many people know the life story of  St. Elizabeth Ann Seton (August 28, 1774 – January 4, 1821). Her conversion from devout Anglican, her struggles to live her new faith and her accomplishments, including starting what eventually became the parochial school system in America and founding the Sisters of Charity are as much a part of U.S. history as they are hallowed hagiography.

What many people might not realize, however, is that throughout much of her adult life, St. Elizabeth faced a very modern kind of suffering—penury. From the time she and her husband went bankrupt early in their marriage until her latter years struggling to maintain her convents and sisters, Elizabeth knew first-hand what it was like to suffer from lack of funds and experience involuntary poverty…

Her life, and her on-going struggle with the suffering associated with lack of money, can be an inspiration to those of us who also face financial stress. 

One of the first lessons is that we, like Elizabeth, must let go of fear, trusting that God will provide. Although William was sure he was headed for debtors’ prison, she maintained a steadfast conviction that somehow it would all work out. When we are faced with mounting debt and no way to pay it off, we have two choices—either we can despair or we can trust that we will be shown a way. Despair only will increase our suffering, adding unnecessarily to our pain. Trust allows us to think more clearly and thereby see options that might not have been visible when we were blinded by fear. However, as with many things, the choice between trust and despair is always ours.

A second lesson from Elizabeth is that while trusting that God will provide is important, we also have to do our part on a practical level. Elizabeth needed to find a way to support her family. She hadn’t planned on being a teacher, but when the opportunity to teach arose, she took it. Moreover, even though she had a gift for teaching, she didn’t give it away; she charged her students. She realized that she had to make money, not just expect it to come out of thin air. 

Sometimes we get the mistaken idea that it isn’t “spiritual” to use our talents to make money, but even the Scripture says that the workman is worthy of hire. If we are in financial difficulty and we have an ability or a talent, we are duty bound to use that in order to support ourselves and our families. Since using our talent is always the will of God, it’s a sure and safe place to begin.

Space for New Joy

A year ago at this time, I was reflecting that 2011 was probably the worst year of my life. Little did I know that 2012 was going to be even more difficult. When I was writing last year's complaint, I had no idea that my mother would die in a few days and I would be catapulted into a year of griefwalking, coupled with anxiety and panic.

It's a good thing we don't know what's coming or we wouldn't have the fortitude to withstand it. At least I wouldn't. If I had been told a year ago that the 2012 was going to be much more challenging on every level than 2011, I would have curled up in the fetal position and refused to move.

But today, in these first bright days of 2013, I realize I have gained an important lesson.  I don't want to look back.  I don't want to go over 2012 and remember all the dark and difficult days.  I don't want to relive the fear, the panic, the grief, the sorrow, the anguish, the struggles.  I just want them to be part of the past, and not carry them with me into the future.

I don't know what this year will bring...thankfully...but I hope and pray that after two years of sorrow mounted on sorrow, these words of the great Sufi mystic Rumi will ring true and soon "new joy can find space" in my life.

 Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.

A New Year and a Year of Gratitude

 
I've never been much for New Years or New Year's resolutions. Often January 1 comes and goes without my paying too much attention to it, other than to take down Christmas decorations and to note if either Oregon or Stanford is playing in a bowl game. 

But this year is different. My mother died a year ago January and even when I'm not actually thinking about the anniversary, it's always lurking in the back of my mind.

It has been a long year. A year of many changes and many challenges. Sometimes I didn't think that I would actually make it through. Panic, depression, fear and anxiety have all taken their places on the stage of my life; sometimes playing starring roles!

While it's tempting to look back and perhaps wallow in the pains and pangs of 2012, my one resolution for 2013 is to let the past be the past and to try to live more fully in the present. On January 27, the anniversary of my mother's death, I will truly start a new year, a new beginning to the rest of  my life. A year of mourning will be ended and I will have passed through all the significant events.

May my year of griefwalking give way to a year of dancing.

But before I leave 2012 entirely, I want to recount a few of the things I am grateful for:

1. Restoration of a once-fractured relationship
2. A positive ending to a breast cancer scare
3. The gradual ebbing of panic and anxiety
4. Friends who stayed with me during this annus horribulus
5. Answered prayer...more "yes" than "no"

A Year (Almost) of Prayer

Since last May I've been keeping a Prayer Scorecard, a list of answered and unanswered prayers. The original idea was to help me see if my prayers were really being answered. It had been a bleak and difficult year and I needed some measurable evidence.

Now that the year is coming to an end, I've tallied up the prayers. Now, many of them, especially the ones that are still in the Wait or Not Yet Answered category have been moved from month to month, so the tally isn't completely accurate. But the ratio of yes, no and not yet is what interests me.

So, from May to December, there have been:
47 Yes
25 No
78 Not Yet

So, I have had nearly twice as many prayer requests granted as I have had denied. But nearly as many prayers as the combined yes and no are still unanswered. Since most of these, if not all, eventually have to have a yes or no, I'm going to continue keeping the Score Card for a few more months, at least.

And I continue to hope that the majority of prayers will be "yes" again in 2013.

A Year (Almost) of Prayer

Since last May I've been keeping a Prayer Scorecard, a list of answered and unanswered prayers. The original idea was to help me see if my prayers were really being answered. It had been a bleak and difficult year and I needed some measurable evidence.

Now that the year is coming to an end, I've tallied up the prayers. Now, many of them, especially the ones that are still in the Wait or Not Yet Answered category have been moved from month to month, so the tally isn't completely accurate. But the ratio of yes, no and not yet is what interests me.

So, from May to December, there have been:
47 Yes
25 No
78 Not Yet

So, I have had nearly twice as many prayer requests granted as I have had denied. But nearly as many prayers as the combined yes and no are still unanswered. Since most of these, if not all, eventually have to have a yes or no, I'm going to continue keeping the Score Card for a few more months, at least.

And I continue to hope that the majority of prayers will be "yes" again in 2013.